Tuesday night... Its amazing how fast my off is spent... haha.... Tmr got to book in again... but then... good thing is at night get to book out once more...

Feeling rather lethargic lately... Having a headache with my designing work... I've come to a point where I need to decide whether designing is just my hobby or is it going to be my work. I need to choose which is it cos it will have a big impact on the things I do.

I've always treat designing as my hobby. I just design at my free will... anything and anytime... This is easy... and fun... and it feels great. Inspirations find me and I do my designs...

But then in recent times... it started to become more like my work. I design because I need to design. I do not now wait for inspirations to find me... I look for them... I force myself to design... and then come up with products that I don't really feel excited about. Because this is what I have to do and not what I want to do. Although the product still comes out nice and beautiful... but... there is no excitement and anticipation about it...

I wanted to go back to it being just my hobby. Where I can take it slow and wait for inspirations to strike me. But then... if I do so... that means to give up on all the work I've done so far. My litbud.com and the many other projects that I have on hand now. Because I don't know when I'll get inspired again about litbud. It may come soon... or it might never come at all. If it never came... then litbud will be stuck like this forever.... There won't be any further developments.

So yar.... duno what to do now....

Oh well... its time for 'Another sunday night' haha.... K lar... didn't get to do it last week cos I got to book in.... Finally life should be going back to the normal monday book in again :)

Life is still the usual sian the past week.... Oh well... Just have to take it lar. Moved to a new bunk liao... All my bunk mates ORDed.... so my bunk is empty now... Moved over to the Coy HQ bunk....

Coming week should be a very short week lar... Off on tues and fri... plus thurs holiday... So I'll be spending my nights all at home :)

Perhaps I will blog more tmr lar... not really in the mood to blog now... bye~

haiz... sian... another sunday night book in.... but okay lar... not as bad as the previous few times... at least dun need to go back so early.

The past week has been bad... really bad... made a lot of terrible mistake. Making mistakes is still fine... the problem is that this mistakes caused trouble to my friends. This is what I hated most. When things goes wrong and its my mistake... then fine.. I can take it. I'm used to making mistakes... afterall this is what make me the person I am today. I do alot of things by trail and error... and in this process.... dozen of mistakes have been made. But I learned from it and get better. So these are my mistakes... I dun want anyone else to be implicated by my mistake. However the 3 big mistakes I've made last week have caused trouble to the people around me... This is what I feel bad about. Haiz.... the past week is really bad luck for me lar... hope that things will turn for the better this coming one.

Anyway... today is my birthday :) Haiz... finally turned 20 already... haha.... old liao lar... My age number no longer start with the digit one... I've lived my second decade as a little human being on this big big world. The coming decade would be the most exciting part of my life. It will be full of energy and vibrance. In this coming decade.... I'll start off with my uni life... then would be my career.... Looking forward to this coming decade. :) My birthday wish? Well... I hope I'll be a happier person :D

Another thing has been bothering me. Somehow people have a impression that I'm a good and obedient person with a sense of responsibility. But then I'm not.... I'm actually a fuck-up person. I do things half fuck, cut corners and take the easy way out. Always having this 'arga arga' 'looks okay then alright' attitude. I don't seek for perfection of anything near that.
So when people have this impression of me. I have to live up to their expectation. I try to do my best in my work... but sometimes I become very tired.... I can't meet their expectation anymore. Did something quite bad last week.... Something that dosen't fit into other's impression of me. But I just dun care... I'm tired...

Anyway... whatever lar hur... I just dun care... but then duno why I have a very strong sense of conscience.... Whenever I do something bad... I'll feel bad for quite sometime... until I start to forget about the matter when time passes by. So yar... maybe this is what that guides me to become a responsible person lar... So yar... U guys still can trust me... haha... :P I'm still a good person... :D

K lar... nothing much already.... Looking forward to the next weekend.... See ya. Have a nice week ahead.

Oh well... time for another entry with...... Another sunday night... haha....

sian lar.... got a lot of things to say... but just not in the mood to type it out.... haiz...

This is just a sad sad entry......

bye~

Hello... its friday night... got a little time to spare before I need to book in for RT tmr, so decided to take this time to write an entry.

Had been feeling rather down for the past few days. Many thing have changed. The old batch of people in my company has ORDed. Now my bunk is only left with myself. Its kind of empty. And there is this sudden discomfort in the change. It used to be very noisy with people making lots of noise even late into the night. I hate it... but now that its gone... it feels kind of empty...

Haiz... the familiar faces will be gone. It took my quite a while to get used to them when I first came into the company 6 months ago. Its only recently that I grew really comfortable with them and now when things are changing for the better, they had to leave. Will miss them....

Duno lar... maybe I'm just getting abit too emotional... haha...

Anyway... life wouldn't be too much a change for me lar... Life still goes on.... and I'm still counting down till my ORD day.... which is like still so far away.... haha.... I want to get out of this place as soon as possible.... I can to go back to my civilian life.... but okay lar... days are not that hard to pass.... there are things to look forward to. For now... its towards the end of the month where I'll get a long weekend. That will also bring me to the month of June already... half way through the year....

Argh.... sian ar.... haven't been feeling well for the past month or so.... neck is aching.... head feels heavy.... hope I'll be able to solve the problem soon...

k lar... nothing much.... bye.

Hello... won't be starting the blog with 'another sunday night' again... haha... cos yar.... its only evening now :D

Gonna book in later.... sian.... but okay lar... feeling better already.... finished my bottle of cough syrup... not taking it anymore... so perhaps without the drowsy side effect I'm feeling better now :) Flu still persist... cough too... but then all under control :)

Just finished downloading a anime called Ray the animation. Its a very interesting medical anime. Its about this doctor with X-ray eyes that can see through a person's body into his organs. Haha.... then there are also other interesting characters in the hospital too.... They have a director that looks and acts like a pirate... and nurses who can fight pretty well... haha... only watch 2 episodes... Its a short anime lar... only like 10+ episodes in total... so yar... highly recommended by me :D

Also been watching planet earth... Its really a very nice documentary.... Can't imagine there are still such nice places left on earth.... If I ever had a chance... I would like to go see those beautiful places with my own eyes... I believe it would be a breath taking experience. So yar... we should really try to conserve our nature. There is this recent hype about conservation... I hope that this would carry on as well... finally this matter is being brought to such high attention... so yar... hope that we will be able to solve the problem before this issue gets cold again....

K lar... nothing much... bye~ Have a nice week ahead :)

Sian.... Fell sick... Argh.... It was a sorethroat at first... then it became a fever and cough... yesterday was feeling better already... but then had to do flu vaccination for ppl at the medical center... Then when priming the needles I think I came into contact with the vaccination... thats where I suppose I got the flu from.... Shouldn't have did the vaccination if I knew this would happen... quite careless on my part... argh... take this as a lesson lor... hope it won't happen again next time.

Tmr still need to book in by 8... cos of the stupid ATP that I have to cover lor.... haiz... waste my time... Didn't want to do the cover at first... but due to some considerations... lan lan have to do it...

Sian ar!!!! Anyway.... its may already... Woho~ Soon it will be june and its half a year gone :D So happy... haha.... K lar... not in the mood to blog too much.... bye~

Haiz... so sian.... quite late already... tired too... but then just dun want to go and sleep.... Dun want to waste a night just like that leh.... Fark up feeling....

Argh.......