Haiz... so sad.... maths is a gonner... not really gone lar... well... I think can still manage a B... but to get an A would really have to depends on whether other people makes the same mistakes or not... and whether I have anymore careless mistakes... oh well.... Lets hope for the best :)

Oh well... I guess the reason why I'm feeling so miserable is because I had too high an expectation for myself. I really aimed very high for maths this time round... duno why... perhaps its because I prepared most for it... or perhaps its the first paper of the week.... You know... in the afternoon on the way to school... then I saw all these other people from other jcs... then I will start observing and predict what grade they will get... haiz... I see them as people that will snatch my As away leh... As you know... it is rumored that the grades allocation is by the bell shape curve thing.... which means that only the top few percents will get an As... so its not a competition of the actual grades you get.... Its a competition of your relative grades... how many more marks you have than other people... Thats why I'm so sad today... I made quite some careless mistakes... so that means that if other people don't make these mistakes as well.. then I will lose out to them and lose my As...

hmm... maybe I should start to take things alittle bit easy lar... shouldn't set too high an expectation... Afterall the important thing is to get into the U and not waste my 2 years in JC...

Actually the thing that fuel me to strive for As is not to get to the Uni.... Uni more or less I should be able to make it... the thing is pride..... Perhaps because from young I've been scoring well... and so called earned some status in my family.... I can't afford to lose this place....

I think it started from PSLE... after scoring well for it... I start to raise the bar for myself... I enjoy the kind of respect I get for having good results... the kind of compliments.... but somehow... I did badly for O lvls... and this further push me to work harder and prove my O lvls results wrong... I also kind of develop a mindset that I'm better than everyone else... If other people can do it... I must be able to do so as well...

I know this kind of thinking is very wrong..... its too arrogant and I'll fall one day... but....

Anyway.... I guess I should really take things alittle bit more lightly lar... being miserable is not a nice feeling... I already did my best for the paper... and guess thats enough :) There's nothing much that I can do now :) So why should I feel miserable? It dosen't help in the situation anyway.

K lar... lets switch to something of a lighter note :)

Today... while I was reading my little booklet of formulas... I came across the formula of tan2x ... at first I didn't want to memorise it cos it dun really come out often... in fact... of all the prelims paper I did.... it dosen't even come out once... but... in the end, I though... nvm lar... since I got nothing more to memorise liao... just arga arga remember lor..... and guess what....I really came out!!!!! LOL... I was like... wa... HENG sia!!!! haha.... lucky I saw it and decide to memorise it... otherwise I wun be able to solve that question.... haha.... but well... the extra marks gain seems to be offset by the amount of careless mistakes I made... haiz.....

Anyway... I also find that this year cambridge very guai lan... They like to put a lot of marks into one question.... then they don't split it up to like part a, part b... and guide us along... for example the curve and normal question... they just write 2 sentences and smack 8 marks on it... they nv split the question up and guide us along by giving a few marks for each part.... Thats why some of the questions u need to think for a while before you start because you have to split up the questions yourself....

somemore... the 3D trigo... super dulan... They give us a hexagon paramid.... and nv draw out the diagram for us.... then have to make us draw out our own 3D diagram.... somemore we draw until very ugly... then very hard to see... very inconsiderate leh.... for those people drawing very lousy how....

Haiz... k lar.. after so much complaining... thinks that all for today... bye :) Tmr got a day break before the next maths paper.... well... I dun want to have too high an expecatation for it liao lar... in case I fall short of it and become miserable again... but do my best lor :) K lar... thats about all... bye :)